Frustrated Mother describes me today.
Yesterday and today my child my wonderful little 16month old girl who drive me insane but i love with all my heart has been bitten by another child at the daycare.
The day care will not tell us who, probably because they fear retaliation/lawsuits whatever.
I am not that kind of person but I understand this policy. The bites have not broken the skin but its still traumatizing for her and it is behavior that we have tried discouraged in my daughters' behavior.
The daycare also will not tell us if it is the same child. The answer we got is probably.
Now granted this is coming from my husband. So it is second hand information as he picks her up in the afternoon.
I have a serious problem with especially if it is the same child. I do not know what they are doing to try and prevent this from occuring. It does not sound like they are overly concerned and this bothers me.
Now I understand that children around the age of 2 have problems explaining their frustration and dealing with their emotions. I also understand that biting, hitting, and tantrums are forms of dealing with these new and unfamiliar feelings they have. However I have been successful in keeping my daughter from biting herself and others. It is a matter of simple redirection and a firm NO. Now I know not every child is like mine however I do not find biting or hitting acceptable behavior from anyone.
The question is do I give it another day and see what happens or do I bring it up in the morning and find out exactly what is going on and try to get it stopped. So far the skin has not been broken but do I wait for that to happen? Because then not only are we talking about traumatizing my behavior we are talking about needing shots and seeing a doctor to make sure everything is ok not to mention it might leave a scar.
Do I wait? Am I being overprotective/paranoid? I know I sometimes overreact is this one of those times? Or is it legitimate concern? Should I talk to the director tomorrow?
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1 comment:
I hate to break it to you, guero, but my daughter comes from "a good home with loving parents" and she did a little biting herself not too long ago. All children go through a period of frustration because their language skills cannot keep up with their emotions regardless of their home environment. This frustration typically manifests itself in tantrums, hitting, and/or biting. If the parents are lucky, there aren't any of those behaviors but that is unlikely. The next best thing is for these behaviors to not become a habit. Thanks to her father, me, and a good daycare provider, biting did not develop into a habit for my daughter. The "We don't bite. Biting is bad." response did the trick when she was younger.
Jax, it is within your rights to ask what the daycare is doing to monitor and curb the biter's habit. I suspect if it continues, the child may not be able to go to the daycare. When my daughter got bitten in daycare (after her "terrible" period), the offender was made to stay separated from the other children, usually in a pack & play. When my daughter tried to retaliate, she was told she would have to have the same consequence. That did the trick for her because she didn't want that. I have forgotten to ask lately but the biter is either under control or no longer with the daycare because there has not been another instance.
The harder task may be keeping your daughter from retaliating in kind or in another manner with the biter as well as not developing a problem of her own. It's unlikely but something to keep an eye on because, as we all know, children mimic what they see. Most likely, your normal response and, hopefully, seeing the consequences associated with the other child's biting will curb the urge in your daughter.
Just keep an eye on the situation but it doesn't seem like something to go ballistic over at the moment.
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